um is this for real.

Reality is setting in. My whole LIFE is changing...  I am freaking out. I have basically 15 days left in this little town that has been home for the last 7 years. 7 years is a long time. 15 days as poor college students with a baby. 15 days before we're only Alumni.

I know there are a lot of people out there who like to complain about Provo, but having left and then come back. Oh how my little heart hurts to say good bye forever. To no longer drive past the hospital where my baby was born or the park where Jt proposed. To miss spotting my old apartments or lingering in buildings where I ate lunch everyday with my friends. Our first apartment as a married couple by smiths and the smoke shop.To let go of the physical objects that I have so many memories of. The old joaquin park/empty dirty lot where I played snow football, the stadium where I screamed my lungs out and tried like crazy to high five C-brown. The married student housing where I have so many fond memories. The Y. The mountains. Oh the mountains. I am going to miss the nearness of those mountains. Sundance and my freshman memories of sledding there. and the grid. and temple square. Hearing the sounds of the football game at home even though we are pretty far south of the stadium. University Ave. The lights from Fat Cats. The dollar theater. Cougar copy, BGC, 7 peaks. The ride board and the one time as a freshman I drove 7 hours with a complete stranger (who was probably 25) to colorado for thanksgiving. The duck pond, the rb stairs. Kiwanis park where I played with Miley all the time her first summer. My window at liberty square. Park city. DI. Church buildings everywhere. Not being a religious minority.

Knowing who I am in a place and how I fit in and where I can go to feel at home and like myself. I feel like the fall got away from me and I didn't do as much as I could have to really soak up provo. Knowing that someplace that is SO SO SO important to me won't even know that I'm gone. life will just go on.

Excited for the future but so so sad to leave this place. This little town that has been so wonderful to us and knowing that it's going to keep on changing without us and that when we come back it won't be what I know. That when I come back to show my babies MY BYU it definitely won't be the same. And that they might not think its as fabulous as I remember and won't be able to see how it can change your life, your entire everything. I hope and dream that they want to come here so they can know just a little bit of what their parents lived.

bridal veil falls

breathtaking mountains in the distance

Don't get me wrong I am excited for FL.